Wedding Wednesday Q&A: Why A Wedding Referral Isn’t Always Good

Wedding Wednesdays Q&A answered by Destination wedding planner Mango Muse Events

Q: I’m looking for a DJ for my wedding and a friend of mine recommended this friend of her’s.  He’s very nice and seems like a good guy.  He’s also offering me a great deal, which really excites me!  But, I’m just a tiny bit worried that he won’t be good.  Because how can you really judge a DJ you’ve never heard?  I guess my question is just, should I use him?  Is there anything I need to be worried about?

This is such a great question!  Because it’s not something people always think about.  When they get a wedding referral, they assume that vendor referral is good.

But, the truth is that isn’t always the case.

Because there are two reasons why a wedding referral isn’t always good:

Reason #1 – The first reason is because the referral might not be a good fit for you.  No matter how good or not good they are at what they do, they just might not match your personality or style.  Or the experience you want to create.  But also…

Reason #2 – Because they may not actually be that good or reputable.  When you get a referral you tend to let your guard down and not look as closely at them as you would someone you found on google.

So, it’s really important that you do your research.  Look into them, get a reference or find out more beyond the referral itself.

And most importantly, make sure you have a conversation or meeting.  You need to get a sense of not only who they are but if you feel they’re capable.  And if they fit with what you want!

Bride and groom running from photographer. San Francisco wedding by destination wedding planner Jamie Chang of Mango Muse Events.

(Photo credit: VAS Photo)

Now this isn’t just words of warning, I’ve had experiences with situations just like this.

Here’s a real life example…

I started working with a couple who had made it part way through their planning when they decided they needed more help.  Since they had done some planning, they had also booked some of their vendors, including their DJ.

Now I’ve done this before and worked with couples who already had part of their team in place.  What I do is just incorporate those team members and coordinate with them as I would anyone else.

But, seeing as I don’t know these vendors personally and I didn’t vet them, I can never really vouch for them or know what to expect.

Most of the time, it works out fine.  But, every now and again it doesn’t.

That was the case with this DJ.  He was a friend of a friend which is why they hired him.

He was definitely a nice guy and in our review and planning meeting, he seemed to understand everything.

And yet, when the wedding day came, he was just all over the place.

He didn’t know what he was doing.  He was confused.

And sadly he messed up quite a bit. 

From the music to the announcements to his setup even.  I did everything I could to help him, but in the end I couldn’t do his job for him.

Here’s the thing…The wedding referral you get could be fantastic.

But, they could also be really bad for one of the reasons mentioned previously.

Make sure they’re the former, not the latter before you choose them.  So that you choose the right person for you and get the awesome wedding experience you’re looking for.

Wedding guests dancing and having a great time at a private estate destination wedding in Hawaii by Destination wedding planner Mango Muse Events

(Photo credit: Christie Pham Photography)

One more note here that I think is important to mention, don’t be swayed by price.

Unless your DJ and music doesn’t matter (which I imagine isn’t the case), don’t use price to make your decision. It obviously plays a factor, but don’t let that be your only guideline.

Because you get what you pay for.  

And this really applies to all wedding vendors.

If someone’s cheaper, they’re cheaper for a reason.

Maybe it’s because they’re an amateur and have little experience.  Maybe it’s because their customer service isn’t great.  Or maybe it’s because their equipment is janky.

If you’re going to choose someone cheaper, make sure the reason they’re cheaper is something you’re comfortable with.

Bridesmaids in aqua dresses and peach and white bouquets at a wedding ceremony in Hawaii by destination wedding planner Mango Muse Events

(Photo credit: What a Day! Photography)

Because in the end you want a quality vendor.  Someone you like, who fits what you’re looking for and is good at what they do.

And there are a range of vendors who could fit that bill.  It’s just a matter of finding the quality wedding vendor for you.

Need some help finding those quality vendors that fit what you’re looking for?  It’s one of the things we’re great at, matching vendors to your needs, personality and style.  Contact us today so you can feel confident in your decisions.

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