Wedding Wednesdays Q&A: How to Avoid a Wedding Meltdown

Wedding Wednesdays Q&A by Jamie Chang Destination Wedding Planner of Mango Muse Events

Q:  My wedding is 2 months away and I feel like I’m living in a nightmare.  My florist isn’t responding to me.  My hair and makeup trial was a total bust.  I don’t know what to do for my first dance song.  And I cannot seem to get all the answers to my questions.  Am I in the twilight zone?  I don’t understand what is happening and I’m freaking out.  Help!  What do I do?

I know what you’re feeling, time is running out and your anxiety is building because nothing is going right.  You’re having a wedding meltdown, which is really common.

Bride and groom making faces on the beach at their Hawaii destination wedding by Destination wedding planner, Mango Muse Events

(Photo credit: Christie Pham Photography)

So, first, take a moment, close your eyes and just breathe for me.  Just breathe and let the tension and the stress settle down for a moment.  Let your tense shoulders and furrowed brow relax.  Slow things down and just breathe.

Ok, now that you’re calmer, I want you to think about the big picture.  You have 2 months and that is still a good chunk of time.  That is 8 weeks and you can do a lot in 8 weeks.  Even if you are behind, you still have time.  It’s not insurmountable or impossible.  So, feel good about that.

Now, many of the problems you mentioned were vendor related.  One thing to keep in mind is that it’s still wedding season which means they’re busy and response times are not the fastest.  It’s definitely not an excuse, but it’s a reality.  This doesn’t mean your wedding vendors don’t care about your wedding.  It just means they may not be able to get back to you as quickly as you would like.

If you hired good, solid professionals, they will get back to you and make sure everything happens as it should.  Just follow up to remind them.  But, if you hired someone a little less qualified or experienced, you’ll want to really stay on top of them and make them get back to you.  Just keep pushing.  I know it’s not fun, but sometimes you need to be the squeaky wheel.

Now if your vendor is not performing as you expected (like your hair/makeup artist) and you’re really unhappy, it’s time to move on.  You still have time to find someone new.  So, do it.  You’ll feel better and it will be worth it in the end.

For all the items that you’re personally working on like your first dance song or decor pieces, remember to take it step by step.  Doing them all at once is what makes it feel overwhelming and stressful.  Not everything has to be done right now!  Tackle the pieces you need immediately, then work on the next thing and then the next.

For example, you probably have another month to finalize your first dance song, so put that on the back burner for a little bit.  Don’t pressure yourself to come up with a song right now.  While on the other hand, you may need to finalize your schedule and timing in order to make sure it works for everyone, so focus on that now.  Or in another example, don’t worry about the card box you need to get, but do make sure you order your wedding rings.

You don’t want another wedding meltdown, so remember to breathe and know that you still have time.  Take it bit by bit and it will all come together.

Follow up with your vendors and prioritize.  Don’t tackle it all at once, it will make a difference, I promise.

And lastly, ask for help if you’re personally crunched for time because of work or other obligations.  Get friends or family involved or hire a wedding planner.  Many hands make light work!

You can do it and when your wedding day comes you won’t even remember you had a wedding meltdown at all.

Bride and groom hugging after seeing each other for the first time on their wedding day at their Sonoma destination wedding by Destination wedding planner, Mango Muse Events

(Photo credit: Andria Lo Weddings)

Got a wedding planning question you need help with?  Please share it in a comment below and we’ll get you the answers you need.

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