Have you seen the new Beauty and the Beast movie? I haven’t yet had a chance, but I’ve been humming the songs ever since it came out. And the one that keeps popping up in my head is “Be Our Guest”. I know it’s not the signature song, but it’s so uplifting and fun.
If you’ve not seen the movie, there is a scene where the members of the castle break into song and dance because they get to serve a guest, Belle. The song is about their excitement in being able to cater to Belle’s needs and serve her a great meal and a good experience.
So, obviously, it’s a bit over the top (in a fun way). And while you aren’t the ones serving your guests, you are creating an experience for them. It’s a good reminder to make sure you remember your wedding guests.
If you joined me on our 5-day live wedding planning party, you’ll know that one of the mistakes we talked about was forgetting your guests. This is a really big part of your wedding day that you don’t want to forget about. And when you get caught up in the vision you have or an image you’ve constructed in your head, it can be really easy to forget what that means for your guests.
So, it’s important to think about your wedding guests. Put yourselves in their shoes and create an amazing experience for them.
But, at the same time, you don’t want to forget yourselves. In our Beauty and the Beast example, they’re so excited to serve they’re making it all about her. They want to cater to her every need.
It’s important that you remember your guests and make sure they feel comfortable and taken care of. But the reality is that you won’t be able to cater to everyone’s needs at your wedding. And thus, you shouldn’t try. Don’t bend yourself backward to try to make everyone happy. Because then YOU won’t be. And we don’t want that to happen.
The key is to find that nice middle ground. Where you’re keeping your guests in mind, but also choosing to do what makes sense for you and the wedding you want.
A great example that works perfectly with Beauty and the Beast is your wedding meal. This is one of a few areas that really affects your wedding guests.
So, I work with a lot of couples who are foodies but have family or friends, who as a whole are less adventurous. And things like lamb or items with spicy flavors they may not touch. So, the solution is to stay away from the items that may be too difficult for your guests to handle. And instead chose items that are more comfortable and commonplace, but with some interesting preparations or sides. Or do a buffet with a variety of items. This way it still caters to your guests, but also to your tastes as well.
Now if you really love a certain type of food or flavor and you want to incorporate it but not scare off your guests, consider making it a part of your appetizers. You’ll be serving multiple different appetizers, so if one or two are a bit too scary, they can just not eat it. It exposes them to it without forcing it to be their main meal.
Another area related to your wedding meal is your wedding cake or desserts. A question I get a lot is about the types of dessert or cake to serve and whether you need to have multiple options. So, it’s important to know that you won’t be able to please everyone. Some people just don’t eat cake or don’t like chocolate or are gluten-free.
So, the solution is to provide some variety if you can, but still, choose things that you like. And if you can’t provide a variety (i.e. you’re only serving cake), then just do what you want. Your wedding guests can choose to eat the dessert or not. It’s not your main meal, so it’s ok to do more of what you want in this area.
(Photo credit: Jerry Yoon Photographers)
The takeaway here is to remember your guests and make sure you’re keeping them in mind when you’re planning your wedding. But, don’t overly cater to their needs to the point where you’re no longer happy.
Find your happy balance where you think they’ll be happy and you will be too. And then you can have your waiters come out and sing, “Be our guest…be our guest….”
What’s one area where you struggle between what your guests would like and what you would? Share it with us in a comment below and we’ll help you find your happy balance.