Wedding Wednesdays Q&A: How To Pick Your Ceremony Officiant
Q: We’re just starting to plan our wedding and one of my friends recently asked who was going to marry us. I sort of stared at her blankly because I had no idea! So, I started thinking that I should probably figure this out. We are not having a church wedding, but beyond that, I don’t know what we want. So, I wanted to ask, how do you pick your ceremony officiant? What do I need to figure out in order to pick someone?
Great question! The ceremony is really important (in my opinion, the most important) part of your wedding day, so I’m so glad you asked. To start the ceremony officiant process, you’ll want to first figure out the kind of ceremony officiant you want. If you are not having a religious ceremony, then there are really 2 types of ceremony officiants, the ones you hire or someone you know.
Hiring a ceremony officiant is a great because they are pros. They know what they are doing and can create a custom ceremony for you with much less thought on your end. Some are writers, most are great speakers and they’ve seen it all so they can recommend ideas and tell you what will work and will not work. On the other hand, choosing someone you know to be your ceremony officiant makes your wedding super personal and meaningful. They can say things about you and your fiancé (and to you) because they know you and possibly know many of your guests as well. In addition, you can really construct your ceremony to be exactly what you want because you have full control. Hiring a ceremony officiant is easier, but choosing someone you know is more meaningful.
Once you’ve figured out which type of ceremony officiant is the best fit for you and your fiancé, then you need to narrow down the type of person you want marrying you. You’ll want to think about and ask yourself the following questions:
What is important to you about the ceremony?
What do you want the ceremony to be like? Do you want it to be lighthearted or serious or romantic or semi-religious or non-traditional, etc…?
What do you want to happen in your ceremony? Is there something special you want to include?
Do you want your ceremony officiant to be of a certain gender?
Armed with these answers you should have a clearer picture of what you want, so that when you start looking for your ceremony officiant (either a vendor to hire or one of your family/friends) you will be able to better assess who might be a good fit for you. And then you’re on your way to finding the right person to be your ceremony officiant!
(Photo credit: Chrisman Studios)
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Thanks for pointing out that you need to figure out what kind of ceremony officiant you want. You also said that if you are not having a religious ceremony then there are two types of officiants. I think it’s a good idea to choose an officiant that gets along with your family and friends and is easy to talk to.
Hi Cindy – Glad you liked the tips! Yes I agree, having an officiant who you connect with and who you find easy to talk to is important. It makes for a much more meaningful ceremony and a better working relationship.