Hello everyone and welcome to another Wedding Wednesdays Q&A where we answer your most pressing wedding planning questions. Today’s question is about competing weddings.
Q: After I got engaged, my brother also got engaged. I was thrilled for him until I heard that they were thinking of the same time frame as we were and even the same destination location. I don’t want to have to share my wedding with anyone else, but it seems silly to have all of our family fly out to the same location within a few weeks of each other. I don’t know what to do. Help!
You may be surprised but I come across this situation quite often. It’s not always a sibling, but sometimes a cousin or a friend. The first thing I have to say is that it’s important that your wedding be your own. It’s about the two of you and your love and creating your own memories. So, don’t even consider the idea of a double wedding.
Now, the first thing you want to do is to sit down with your brother and his fiancé and have a heart to heart. Explain to them how you feel and your concerns and ask how set they are on their date and if they are willing to move it since you were engaged first.
If they aren’t willing to budge, think about how important it is to you to have that date and how you would feel about moving it. Putting some time between your destination wedding and theirs can be a good thing as it will not only be less taxing on your parents, but will help to keep your weddings separate. You could consider moving it 4-6 months later or earlier so that you’d be in a different season. That way even if it is the same location, it would feel different.
In the end, though, you have to feel comfortable with whatever decision you make, whether that is to keep your date or to move it. Once again, this is a celebration of the two of you and so you want it to feel right. Don’t worry about anyone else and make the right decision for you two. And if you decide to keep your date and you’re worried about people coming to two similar weddings, don’t be. Not only are there lots of ways to make your wedding unique and personalized (like choosing a different venue and vendors and customizing all the details), but your wedding has you two which makes it unique all by itself.
(Photo credit: VAS Photography)
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